Yet here we are without a manager! So is Fat Fred buying the players and picking the team? What a load of bollox!
The report: "The Brazilian looks set to quit Spain in the summer. The Magpies are on the look out for a 'big name' replacement for Alan Shearer who is set to retire at the end of the season and a move for Ronaldo could be on the cards after the player hinted at a move to the Premiership in the summer.
"Italian giants Inter Milan are keen to take him back to the San Siro while Juventus have also expressed an interest. The Premiership could be his preferred destination though and the likes of Chelsea and Arsenal would no doubt be keen if he became available.
"Newcastle can also be added to that list after a source close to the club claimed Freddy Shepherd would do all he could to re-unite the player with his former Madrid team-mate Michael Owen."
This mysterious Newcastle United source is supposed to have said: "If Ronaldo is available and wants to come to England we will be ready to make a move. Everyone laughed when we went for Michael Owen and said that it wouldn't happen.
"But chairman Freddy Shepherd proved the doubters wrong and the same could happen if Ronaldo is put up for sale. He would be affordable as he is 30 this year and the wages will not be a problem with Alan Shearer retiring in the summer."
How to make a story out of nothing!