John Carver: "He came back with this name Fraser Forster from the Royal Grammar School, and I thought, 'Royal Grammar School? That's a rugby school.'
"He said, 'But he's 6'7", he's a big lad. And I said, 'Let's go and get him', so we got him, we signed him.
"We sat down with his mum and dad and they were more bothered about his education than goalkeeping.
"I will be so proud to see him here, and his family. But hopefully he will be on the wrong end of a good result for us."
Just for the record, Alan Pardew's first dealings at St James' Park when he arrived four years ago was to sign goalkeeper Rob Elliot from Charlton Athletic and loan out Forster to Celtic.
Never a fan of the Hexham-born goalkeeper, Pardew bragged that Newcastle got £2m for him.
Celtic sold him for £10m with an add-on that they pick up an extra £2m after so many games.
Pardew ... you MUPPET!