20 MEMORIES OF MIKE ASHLEY
Ten Years of Mike Ashley
1) Twice relegated (pending the inevitable)
2) Twice appointed Joe Kinnear
3) Only two top ten finishes in ten years.
4) Five relegation fights.
5) Twice lost major lawsuits launched by his own staff (Keegan/Gutierez)
6) Branded a "liar" by a high court judge in the Keegan trial.
7) Found guilty of firing a player because he had cancer in the Gutierez trial!
8) Had John Carver fire two senior players by telephone (the same call - to save money) then...fired John Carver.
9) Hired John Carver.
10) Fired the popular Chris Hughton after he masterminded the club's return to the Premier League and a 5-1 thrashing of Sunderland.
11) Hired Alan Pardew who became the first ever NUFC manager to lose four consecutive derbies and the worst losing streak for 100 years!
12) Inherited debt of 129 million when he bought the club - this has remained static for TEN YEARS, despite his media friends telling everyone he "cleared the debt" - he hasn't...not a penny. He transferred it to himself so that instead of NUFC owing a bank £129 million we owe HIM £129 million.A figure that never reduces despite the vast profits he has turned over in player sales nearly every season.
None of this debt has ever been cleared despite this benevolence allowing him to cream transfer profits and use the stadium as his own personal advertising space for Sports Direct FOR FREE!
13) Changed the name of St. James Park to "Sports Direct Arena". Total funds received from Sports Direct for this honour: £0
14) Declared it club policy at a fans forum that winning cups was "not a priority" as it interfered with club's stated goal of "finishing tenth".
15) Appointed Steve McClaren who was not good enough for Championship clubs Nottingham Forest and Derby County ... but would be the Miracle Man at St James' Park.
16) Declared "Don't come crying to me" around a month ago when it became apparent that the club will now be relegated for the second time under his watch.
17) Declared "I have virtually nil effect on Newcastle United" in the same interview.
18) Changed the name of "Shearer's Bar" the day after Shearer said on Match Of The Day "Ashley isn't good for this club."
19) He has turned the stadium into a tacky billboard for a zero hours contract charver clothes store.
20) He dismantled the "singing section" in the Leazes and sent them to other parts of the ground because everyone became Anti-Ashley.
He sucked the willpower out of supporters who were once considered some of the noisiest in the country.
Do whatever it takes to get rid of this parasite...and no, I don't mean throwing a bunch of f***ing beachballs onto the pitch like Villa fans.
Let's get the bastard out!